Mourning is that process through which our body, both physically and emotionally, is rebalanced after suffering a loss of any kind: from the death of a loved one, to migration through divorce or separation. Deaths are the most frequent causes of pain, and that balance must be found that makes us function again in a healthy way.
The grieving process, if it is healthy, will occur naturally but not without pain or negative emotions. This period will last a specific time and will end up placing all those emotions in their place, leaving a scar but clean and healed.
Stages of grief
We can distinguish up to five phases or stages of grief, proposed by Dr.. Elisabeth Kübler Ross:
1. Denial: We do not want or can not accept the situation. It is a stage of defense against the terrifying situation.
2. Anger : The individual gets angry with the environment and the situation, and asks questions like, why me? or what have I done?
3. Negotiation: It is about correcting the situation through agreements with oneself. We often ask for the impossible or what is beyond our reach.
4. Depression: Process understood as a phase, characterized by sadness, demotivation and disconnection from the environment.
5. Acceptance: The individual relocates all emotions to be able to continue with his life in a healthy and balanced way.
The phases do not have to occur in that order, but they can be overlapped or even not all of them occur.
Benefits of going to the specialist
It is essential professional help in a process of pathological grief, as it can contaminate our entire life preventing us from functioning in a balanced way. After promoting a correct link with the patient, the professional will accompany him on that path of grief to help in his process of emotional recovery. For this, we perform four tasks:
1. Accept the reality of the loss
2. Work emotions and their pain
3. Adaptation to a new medium with that absence
4. Relocation of the object of the loss to continue to function healthily
We must go to a professional when we see that the pain directly interferes with our daily life and after a while has not lowered the intensity of that pain. The grieving process ends when you begin to think about the loss sadly and not with pain, blockage or despair.